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Check this—did ya know escorts in old Rome were called “comites”? Means “companions,” but half the time they were just muscle for hire. Little known fact, bam! Blows my mind how it’s flipped—now it’s all “VIP service” or some shady Craigslist vibe. I’m sittin’ here, sippin’ my tequila, thinkin’, “Man, humanity’s a trip.” Makes me wanna flex and yell, “Can you smell what The Rock’s cookin’?” ‘Cause this escort game’s got layers, bruh!

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After that, I decide to take a breather. I stroll down to the park by the Destrnik Castle. It’s beautiful there, you know? But guess what? There’s a bunch of kids playing soccer, and one of them kicks the ball right at me! I’m like, “Really? Is this my life now?” I dodge it just in time, but I’m still fuming.