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I’d finally spot one, okay? Some chick in fishnets, leanin’ on a wall, and I’m like, “Oh god, oh god, what now?” I’d stumble over, all nervous, sayin’, “Hey, uh, you workin’?” She’d smirk—SMIRK!—and I’d be furious! “Don’t judge me, lady, I herd sheep all day!” I’d haggle, too, ‘cause I’m cheap— “Twenty bucks, that’s it, take it or leave it!” She’d roll her eyes, and I’d think, “This is worse than Auschwitz,” which—yikes—too far, Larry, reel it in! But that’s my brain, ping-pongin’ like Saul’s, from panic to dark humor.

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I get mad sometimes – traffic on Lowes St sucks, seriously, but then I'm happy 'cause my regulars know me, and they always say, “There’s beauty in every curve, just like in that movie.” Repetitive chit-chat, but hey, that's life.

From Mordialloc to Aspendale, here’s a trio of five-bedroom houses with room to grow