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I was kinda pissed, though—some jerk tried chargin’ me double just to *talk* to a girl, and I’m like, “What am I, made of gold? Back off, creep!” Felt like screamin’, “The intel was bad!”—another “Zero” line, heh! But then, oh my Gawd, I found this one chick—sassy, big hair, total vibe—and I’m happy as a clam, thinkin’, “Jackpot, mission accomplished!” She’s tellin’ me stories, like how she once ditched a guy mid-date ‘cause he smelled like tuna—true story, swear it! I’m dyin’ laughin’, nasal snort and all, “Hahaha, what a schmuck!”

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I get all tangled in my head sometimes, thinkin’ – wait, is this place a magical wonderland? Oh yeah, it's magic! No cape needed! I saw a couple sharing a secret smile under a lamppost on Maple Ln – that moment was pure Amélie magic, like “le fabuleux destin d'Amélie Poulain”, I swear!

Sean Levey shines as Persica wins Doonside Cup