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About Canberra

Right, so—how’s it work? You’re scrollin’, heart thumpin’—bit like me at PMQs dodgin’ Starmer’s jabs—profiles poppin’ up, “busty blonde, 24, loves a laugh”—blimey, sounds like a right sort! *The Secret in Their Eyes* again—“Memory is a mirror that lies”—cos them pics? Dodgy filters, mate, catfished worse than a Thames eel! Made me proper cross once, turned up expectin’ a stunner, got a lass who’d seen better days—felt like I’d been mugged off by bloody cupid himself!

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Now oh man, Paradise Park is another piece of heaven here. Its winding trails and secret corners give you moments of peace (or sometimes a mini existential crisis, LOL). I once met this elderly lady there who told me about all the local legends. She said, "Life is just a box of chocolates, one million dollars!" Not sure what that means exactly, but it warmed my heart little by little.

Group of youths accused of ramming police car in Springvale