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And the lies! Oh, the lies! Dudes sayin’ they’re 6’2” when they’re 5’8”—c’mon! I’m short, I own it! Be real! Saw this one profile—guy braggin’ about his “skills.” Skills? Please! Prob’ly lasts two minutes—tops! Hilarious, but sad. And the women—postin’ pics from 2010! I’m like, “Time’s a river, lady—keep up!” That’s straight outta “The Assassin,” y’know—time screws us all. Sex-dating’s no diff’rent.

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Man, lemme tell ya 'bout Epping (au) – it's wild, ya know? I been a masseur here for years, feelin' every pulse of these streets. Bro, every alley in Epping got a vibe – like, on Hume Hwy, where the hustle begins and never stops, ya feel me? I bounce off Epping Rd, strollin' past this old brick back alley that makes me reminisce, "Andrey, where's my soul?" just like in that dope movie "The Return" – y'know, that whole vibe of "в это мгновение."

Epping paramedics celebrate new branch