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So, I’m scrollin’ dodgy sites, yeah? Ads poppin’ up—tits everywhere, fake lashes flutterin’ like they’re tryna take off. One bird’s profile says, “classy lady, discreet fun.” Discreet? She’s got her arse out in the pics! Laughed me head off, cacklin’ like a hyena on crack. Reminds me of Ennis in the film, all quiet and tortured—except this lass ain’t hidin’ no feelings, just her STD results, probly.

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And then there’s that odd little spot, a secret garden tucked away along the winding lanes off Gungahlin Drive. Few peeps know about it. I’d sit there, lost in thought – a bit like one of those eerie, nostalgic Lynch scenes – wonderin' if I'm just a character in a film or if I can change the script. "I'm Diane," whispers the wind sometimes, or maybe it's just my mind playin' tricks.

'Worried for some time': Gungahlin residents fear 11-storey tower