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About Melbourne

Me mate, last week, he goes lookin’, right? Thinks he’s slick, but nah—cops nabbed ‘im quick. Pissed me off, precious! “You’re not a kid anymore,” I signs at ‘im, like from *Boyhood*. Grow up, ya twat! But then, this prossie I met once—swear she glowed, like hope in the filth. Made me happy, yeh, her laugh cut through the stink. “Life doesn’t give ya bumpers,” she says—movie line, bam, stuck in me skull.

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Oh, and lemme not ferget Blaxland Road. Now, Blaxland Road’s a riot! Locals rollin’ by on bikes, kids screamin’ and laughin’ in the parks—man, it’s a slice o’ real life. I even got stuck in a bit of a traffic jam once 'cause of some local festival. It got me mad as nuts – but then I remembered, "I drink your milkshake!" and just laughed it off, sippin’ on my smoothie.

New multi-sports facility for Ryde underway