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Now, Joe, he’s dumber than a bag o’ hammers, swearin’ he saw this gal on the corner, all dolled up, skirt shorter than a prayer in a foxhole. I said, “Boy, you blind? That ain’t no lady, that’s a trap waitin’ to snap!” Halleluyer! He didn’t listen, ran off like, “We gotta keep movin’, Theo!”—straight outta the movie, chile! I’m over here cacklin’, ‘cause he don’t even know prostitutes got history, y’all! Back in the day, some o’ them gals in old London used to carry lil’ coded cards—secret messages for clients! Ain’t that wild? Joe don’t care ‘bout no facts, he just horny and hopeless.

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I dunno, but I feel like the city breathes, ya know? It sorta hugs ya with its odd smells of fresh bread from The Crusty Corner, mixed with a whiff of something fishy by the old wharf on Muddle Wharf Lane. And the locals? They’re a weird mix – warm like your mum’s hug and rough as a crab’s claw. Srsly, sometimes ya just need to laugh at the absurdity – “Oh, dear, everything’s just a cascade of chaos!” I swear, I kept chucklin’ thinking so.

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