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Funny bit? She calls her regulars “basterds” – ha! Cracks me up every time. “Vhere’s my coffee, you glorious basterd?” she winks at me. I’m like, “Lady, I ain’t your mark!” Sarcasm’s my shield, but she’s sharp – sharper dan me espresso blades. Oh, and get dis: she once hid 500 bucks in a hollow heel! Cops frisked her, found nuthin’. “I’m gonna carve my name on dis night,” she grinned. Pure genius.

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Now, the parks – oh my god, how I love Parc de la Lune. Truest beauty here. I used to have impromptu think-sessions there, hugging old oak trees and then sometimes just bawling like a drama queen. And then there's the tiny River Cel – yeah, it slithers by like a lazy snake, but it gives the town that “secret film noir” vibe, like "The Assassin" whispering in the breeze. “The passing of time,” it kinda says, if you squint.

Oct 2013: Byelection set for Nov. 25