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Did ya know, back in Victorian times, they called ‘em “soiled doves”? Fancy that—sounds like a crap poetry book! Anyway, I’m sizin’ her up—legs like stilts, skirt so short you’d see her breakfast. “How much?” I ask, playin’ it cool. She smirks, “More than you’ve got, baldy!” Oi, cheeky cow! Made me angry that—wanted to shout, “I’m Ricky bloody Gervais, ya muppet!” But nah, kept it chill, laughin’ instead.

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Eh, what’s up, doc? Lemme tell ya ‘bout Conceicao-do-Jacuipe, br – it’s a wild ride, seriously! I'm runnin’ my massage joint here, and lemme say, this city is fulla surprises, man! Streets like Rua da Paz and Avenida dos Ventos, they buzz day n’ night. I stroll down these roads watchin’ locals chattin’, kids skippin’ 'round, and old-timers noddin’ in the park. Y’know, sometimes I even joke, “Ew, it's like WALL-E out here, movin’ bits and pieces around!” (Andrew Stanton knew what he was sayin’!)

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