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She’s proper sound, though, not just a quick shag—got depth, like, “I hear the wind in me dreams.” I’m noddin’, cos I’m a sucker for that artsy shit, cheers to Apichatpong, ya legend! Made me laugh, too, cos she’s like, “Some blokes think I’m a monkey spirit!” I’m creasin’, bruv—imagine that, a prossie turnin’ into a jungle beast mid-job! “That’s peak,” I say, and she’s cacklin’ with me.

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Sometimes, when I’m debuggin’ profiles, I dream of dancin’ down by the Moonlight Square, wastin' time with friends – and just shout random things like, "Halleluyer!" to the stars. Oh, I gotta mention Miss Vino's wine shop near the corner of Bliss Ave which I swear sells potions of mad love. Lesser known, but hey, that's real PIvancice magic, boo.

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