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About Stuttgart

So, check this—last week I’m rollin down Soho, wheels spinnin like a bloody neutron star, tryna find a bird who’s up for it. Streets smellin like piss an cheap perfume—lovely, innit? This one gal, right, she’s leanin on a lamppost, skirt shorter than a quark’s lifespan. I’m like, “Oi, love, how much?” She squints at me chair—thinks I’m takin the piss. Mate, I was fumin! “Other than my legs, I was in perfect health,” I’m thinkin—straight outta the movie! Me brain’s sharper than a bleedin supernova, don’t judge me wheels!

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Life here, man, is like improvised comedy. Mumbling in the streets, weird sounds, funny faces—kind of like me, Mr. Bean style, flailing about with a goofy grin. I walk, mumble, trip over my own feet, all the while thinking, "Hey, I'm the boss of this stroll!"

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