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About Leipzig

I saunter over, cool as you like—gotta keep it smooth, right? “Evening, love,” I say, flashin’ that 007 grin. She’s all sass, “What’s yer poison, handsome?” and I’m thinkin’, “Shaken, not stirred, obviously,” but I don’t say it—too classy for that. Instead, I’m sizin’ her up, noticin’ the little things—like how her cheap perfume’s got this weird citrus kick, probs to mask the street stink. Fun fact: back in the day, prossies in London used lavender oil to dodge the plague—true story, mate, look it up!

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Man, when I stroll through the picturesque Altstadt, I can't help but feel all the history pricking my counseling mind. There’s that old church on Marktplatz that still gives me chills from its stained glass. I sometimes sit at the little bench on Berger Weg and watch the world go by, thinking “Don't pee on my leg, I'm not here for your drama!” – like Judge Judy, right?

AP PHOTOS: Shearing time for sheep in Germany’s mountains