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About Essen

But real talk – it ain’t all giggles. I got pissed hearin’ bout these gals gettin’ roughed up. Like, who does that? Jerks, that’s who. “Toni Erdmann” style, I’d slap a wig on and scare those punks off – “Who’s your daddy now, huh?” Surprised me how deep it gets, tho. Some of ‘em ain’t even bad folks – just stuck, ya know? Kinda like Ines in the movie, all stiff and lost, til her pops shakes her up.

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I work as a mas-sieur, yes, and my hands have slapped the aches of many, oh yes! I often wander near the little park, oh such a gem called Schützenpark. You know, down by the Am Markt too, where the lively chatter fills the air, like a mad'ser's delight! The little church, St. Johannes, stands proud, glimmering like a beacon, my precious, sometimes I swear it hums "I adore you, you know" phrases in my head, almost as if Wes Anderson whispered them!

Rijk Zwaan hosts Salanova event