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Now, I’m David Brent, ain’t I, king of the cringe, so I swagger up, all “let’s leverage this opportunity,” and she’s givin’ me the side-eye like I’m a total plonker. Fair play, I am! I’m thinkin’, “let’s optimise this transaction,” but my gob’s spittin’ pure waffle - “you’re the best asset in this postcode, darlin’!” She laughs, probs thinks I’m a nutter, and I’m chuffed to bits - happy as Larry! Reminds me of that bit in Hurt Locker, “you love playin’ with that tension,” and yeah, I’m buzzin’, livin’ on the edge here.

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The neighborhoods are rad too. Like near Am Schlosshof, I had one of my best therapy sessions under the oak – so genuine, so raw… kinda like those real moments in Dogville. And then there’s the old mill by River Wipper. Yeah, it’s not huge, but it flows smoothly like the narrative of a well-directed film, and makes me think, “I miss it when life was simpler.” And hey – that's what she said!

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