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Once heard a yarn—some prossie in Bristol tricked a lord, nicked his whole stash mid-shag! Reckon she could, too. “Thou plantest dreams in me skull,” I tell her, all dramatic. She rolls her eyes—fair, I’m a prat sometimes. Still, I’m chuffed—ain’t every day thou meetest a lass who’d outwit DiCaprio himself!

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Sometimes, I get mad – like when tourists disrespect the charm of Friedrichsplatz. They go rush and miss the little bits, ye know? Heathens, I say, but then I sigh and laugh at their folly. Lately, I snapped at a fella who didn't even care about our quaint coffee spots near "Zum Alten Schmied" – unbelievable!

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