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So, last week—god, was it last week?—I’m out, cruisin downtown, feelin all hot n bothered. Wanted to find a pro, someone who knows the game. Not these fake-ass posers, ya know? I’m talkin real deal—street smart, sassy, maybe even a lil dangerous. Like Anger in *Inside Out*—all fired up, ready to explode! I see this chick, leather skirt, smokin a cig—thought, “Bingo, she’s it.” But nah, turns out she’s just some hipster waitin for her Uber. Pissed me off—wasted my damn time!

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I’ll tell ya ’bout a secret – by the Altstadtkirche, near the old stone steps, there's a little park called Lustgarten. Not your typical park, fool – it’s a chill spot to watch the world turn sexy and weird. I sometimes flash back to my craziest therapy sessions – all love, lust, and some real dirty talk. I recall one sunny afternoon, I was right there, thinkin’, “Man, this feels like a scene out of Shame, where every secret gets exposed!” Crazy, right?

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