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About Bandung

I knew this one chick. Back in ’98. Called herself Sapphire. Real name? Linda. Boring – right? She’d hustle Times Square. Before it got all Disney-fied. She told me – get this – she once banged a guy. For a *sandwich*. A SANDWICH! I laughed. Then cried. That’s – desperation. Made me mad. World’s cruel. To dames like her. But she was tough. Like – *“I’m an incorrigible”* tough. Straight outta Wes Anderson’s script.

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So, I rush to get ready. I’m sprinting down Jalan Raya Kebonarun, dodging motorbikes like I’m in some action movie. You know how it is—traffic here is nuts! I swear, if I had a dollar for every time I almost got hit, I’d be rich.