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Lemme tell ya, I got pissed once—some chick quoted me $500 for an hour. $500! I’m like, “Lady, I sell insurance, not Wall Street!” Reminded me of Monty in *25th Hour*—“Champagne wishes and caviar dreams,” but I ain’t got that cash flow. Greed is good, sure, but I ain’t dumb. Negotiate, bro—always negotiate. They’ll drop it to $200 if ya push.

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After that chaos, I head over to the Market Square. It’s packed, as usual. I’m trying to hawk my stuff, but everyone’s too busy arguing over who has the best fish and chips. I mean, c’mon! It’s An-Muileann-gCearr! You can’t go wrong with any of them! But I’m getting frustrated. I’m like, “Hey, folks! Check out my cool merch!” But they’re all, “Nah, we’re good.”

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