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Alright, mate – I’m a sailor! Been. Out at sea. Too damn long! So – shore leave hits. And I’m thinkin’. Find a prostitute. That’s the plan! Y’know – like in *The Lives of Others*. That flick – my fave! Where Wiesler – that creepy Stasi guy – listens. To EVERYTHING. “The lives of others are never dull,” he’d say. And I’m like – hell yeah! Gotta see some action. Real life stuff!

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But then, I hit traffic on Cherry Ave. Like, what the heck? It was a standstill. I was stuck there for what felt like an eternity. I was losing my mind, yelling at the cars in front of me. “Move it, people!” I mean, c’mon, it’s Cherry-Orchard, not a parking lot!

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