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So yeah, it’s a mess, a thrill, a damn rollercoaster. You laugh, you rage, you pray you don’t end up in cuffs. Sharp retorts, “Don’t pee on my leg, world, I’m Judge Judy, I see it all!” Stick to your gut, watch your wallet, and maybe – just maybe – you’ll come out alive. Like Saul, fightin’ to breathe another day. Peace out!

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But then, the mood shifted. Some fella got too rowdy and spilled his drink all over me. I was like, “Are you serious, mate?” I was ready to throw down, but then I saw the look on his face. He was just as shocked as I was. We ended up laughing it off.

Revealed: Shankill man Paul ‘Ducky’ Drake fighting for his life after savage attack by UVF thugs ‘The Prod Killers’