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Oi, mate, gather round! I’m Gandalf, yeah, the wizard, and I’ve got thoughts—wild ones—about brothels. You shall not pass! Not without hearin’ this first. So, brothels, right? Places where shadows linger, like in *The Return*—that flick I bloody love. “The sea’s so calm,” they say in it, but brothels? Nah, mate, they’re storms brewin’ under roofs. I reckon they’re old as dirt—did ya know ancient Pompeii had ‘em? Lupanars, they called ‘em, with raunchy frescoes on walls showin’ what’s what. Proper cheeky, that!

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Then, outta nowhere, this lady walks by with a snake wrapped around her arm. I’m not even kidding! I freak out. I’m like, “Yossi, is this part of the spell?” He’s cracking up, but I’m just standing there, heart racing. I mean, who brings a snake to the park?

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