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About Naples

One time, yeah, I’m walkin’ Camden, late night, *Before Sunset* still in me head. This lass, right, she’s leanin’ by a lampost, givin’ me the eye. I’m like, “Bruv, is this it? Find a prostitute moment?” Heart’s racin’, I ain’t no punter, but I’m curious, innit. She’s like, “50 quid, love.” I’m thinkin’, Jesse’d say, “I’d have to sleep on it,” like he tells Celine. I laugh, bruv, tell her, “Nah, fam, I’m good!” She shrugs, off she goes. Anticlimax, innit—pure Ali G life.

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So, I’m rushing to the tea house, right? I take a shortcut down Via Cavour, and guess what? There’s a street fair! I mean, who doesn’t love a good street fair? But it was packed! I’m dodging people left and right, trying not to spill my matcha. And then, I see this guy juggling flaming torches. Like, seriously? Who thought that was a good idea? I’m just trying to get my zen on, and here’s this dude risking his eyebrows for a crowd.

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