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Once, I saw this chick—total *Oldboy* moment. Face like she’s hidin’ a secret. “Revenge is a dish best served cold,” I mutter. She didn’t get it—pissed me off! Why’s everyone so dense? But then she smirked—damn, that got me. Happy for a sec, like I wasn’t a Sith. Surprised me how they read ya—prossies got skills. Bet they’d outsmart half the Jedi Council.

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First off, I’m on my way to work, and I stroll down Via Roma. It’s this cute lil’ street, all cobblestones and whitewashed buildings. I’m vibin’, but then BAM! A pigeon poops on my shoulder. Like, seriously? Thanks, nature. I’m already late, and now I’m a walking target for bird droppings. Great start, huh?

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