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She’s decent, though—cracked a laugh when I said, “Don’t fuck me over, darlin’.” Room’s a shithole—stinks of fags and desperation. Bed creaks like a dyin’ whale—nearly broke me back! But she’s quick—knows her game. “You’re not filming this, are ya?” she snaps. I’m like, “Fuck no, I ain’t Haneke!” Laughed me tits off—proper cheeky mare.

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I grab a plate of arancini, and I’m just about to dig in when I see this girl. She’s got the brightest smile, and I’m like, “Wow, who’s that?” I muster up some courage and go talk to her. Turns out, her name’s Sofia, and she’s just as cool as she is cute. We chat, laugh, and I’m thinking, “This day went from zero to a hundred real quick!”

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