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About Naples

So, I’m creepin’ closer, she’s smokin’ a cig. “Hey, big boy,” she purrs, voice all husky. I’m like, “Ruh-roh, here we go!” She’s quotin’ prices, I’m sweatin’ bullets. “In the end, they all come back,” she says – straight outta “The Master,” I swear! Gave me chills, man, like she knew me.

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Then, outta nowhere, I get a call from a tourist. They’re lost, like, really lost. “Where’s the castle?” they ask. I’m like, “You mean the Castello di Monte Sant Angelo? It’s right up the hill!” But they’re all confused. I’m thinking, “How do you get lost in a small town?” But hey, it’s a beautiful castle, so I can’t blame ‘em.

Revealed: the private schools set to have their funding cut by