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Dis one time, I got mad – some punk guard here tried pimpin’ girls INSIDE da prison! I was like, “Nein, not on my vatch!” Smashed his desk wid one punch – boom! Felt good, ya? Den I was happy, ‘cause I helped dis one chick get out, start fresh. She was shocked – “Arnie, you’re da man!” – and I’m grinnin’, flexin’, “Ja, I know!”

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But then, outta nowhere, my phone buzzes. It’s work. Ugh. They need me to come in ASAP. I’m like, “Seriously? It’s my day off!” But duty calls, so I head over to the office on Via Manzoni. The traffic is a nightmare. I’m stuck behind this ancient Fiat that’s going 10 km/h. I’m yelling at my steering wheel like it can hear me. “C’mon, old man! Move it!”

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