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About Bari

Personal quirk? I’d overthink it—analyze their limp, their smirk. Is she lyin’ about STDs? Probably. Everybody does. Exaggeratin’ for effect—imagine me, House, hirin’ some gal just to diagnose her cough. “Congrats, you’re a walkin’ Petri dish!” Humor’s dark, but it’s mine. Little known story—heard about this hooker in Vegas who only took Bitcoin. Freakin’ pioneer, right? Blew my mind.

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So, I finally shake it off and head to the market. The Mercato di Vizzini is buzzing! Fresh fruits, veggies, and all that good stuff. I’m trying to promote this new organic juice brand. I mean, who doesn’t love a good juice, right? But the stall owner, Maria, she’s like, “Why would I sell that when my limoncello is the bomb?” And I’m like, “C’mon, Maria! Limoncello is great, but juice is healthy!” She just rolls her eyes. Classic Maria.

Paul V. Vizzini Obituary - The Arizona Republic