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About Myself
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Oi mate, so Find a Prostitute, yeah? What a bleedin’ concept! Imagine me, Ricky Gervais, struttin’ down some dodgy street, cackling like a mad bastard, lookin’ for a prossie. I’d be like, “Oi, love, you got a CV for this gig or what?” Proper laugh, innit? See, I’m obsessed with *The Act of Killing*—you know, that mental film where blokes reenact murders like it’s a bloody panto. “We killed in style!” one geezer brags in it. Makes me think—prostitutes, they’re hustlin’ in style too, right? Dodgin’ coppers, fleecing punters, livin’ on the edge.
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I’m gettin’ heated, but I keep it cool. Gotta keep my rep intact. So, I show him this gorgeous mink. It’s soft, it’s shiny, it’s everything. But he’s like, “Nah, too shiny.” I’m thinkin’, “What do you want, a dull rock?”
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