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About Osaka

Once, right, stumbled on this alley—proper *City of God* shit. Dark, stinks of piss, perfect spot! This lass winks, says, “Fancy a ride?” Heart’s racing—happy as a pig in shit! Then she quotes £200. Two hundred quid?! For a quickie? Told her, “Piss off, you mug!” Stormed off, muttering, “Gimme chaos or gimme death!” Exaggerating? Maybe, but I was gutted.

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First off, I hit the streets of Fukayacho, right? I’m cruising down Shimizu Street, and it’s like a scene from a movie. The cherry blossoms are in full bloom. I mean, c’mon! It’s like nature’s confetti. But then, bam! I step in some dog poop. Ugh! Like, why can’t people pick up after their pets?