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Little known fact—did ya know prostitutes in ancient Rome had to dye their hair blonde? Stand out, mark em as “dirty.” Wild, right? Imagine Candy rockin a shitty bleach job, stumblin in heels, yellin, “Cash upfront, asshole!” I’d laugh, but it’s sad too. Met her once—well, someone like her—smelled like cheap perfume and regret. Asked her why she does it. “Gotta eat, doc,” she says. Fair. Everybody lies, but hunger don’t.

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Then, outta nowhere, my buddy Kenji bursts in. He’s all outta breath, like he just ran a marathon. Turns out, he saw a festival happening down by the river. The Funaishikawa River, you know? It’s beautiful, especially in the fall. The leaves are all orange and red, and the water sparkles like diamonds. I’m like, “Dude, let’s go!” But Mr. Picky is still there, nitpicking my work. Ugh!