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About Saitama

Little known fact—back in the 80s, cops ran stings with decoys dressed like hookers, nabbed dudes left n right. Fuckin wild, right? History’s a trip. Anyway, this girl, she’s quotin prices like she’s readin a menu—50 for this, 100 for that. I’m thinkin, “Bitch, I ain’t payin for no half-assed quest!” Made me mad as hell—hate gettin played. But then she laughs, all throaty, n I’m like, “Okay, you slick, I’m impressed.”

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Finally, I get to the lab, and it’s chaos. My boss, Mr. Tanaka, is already on my case. “Where were you?” he barks. I’m like, “Dude, I’m here now!” But he’s not having it. I mean, come on, it’s Gifu-shi! We’re supposed to be chillin’ by the Nagaragawa River, not stressing over teeth!

City in Gifu fears losing status as ‘center of Japan’s population’