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About Osaka

Lemme tell ya, I was stoked first time I saw one – all dolled up, struttin like she owned the damn apocalypse. “Witness me!” she mighta yelled, if she’d seen the flick. Made me happy as hell, like I’d just guzzled some Aqua Cola after days of thirst. But then – Great Scott! – some jerk tried rippin me off, sayin she’s “top tier.” Top tier my ass, she looked like she’d been haulin war rigs since ’85! Pissed me off big time, I ain’t no sucker.

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So, I grab it and head to the register. The cashier is super chill, but I’m in a panic. I’m like, “Please, just ring it up!” And she’s all zen, taking her sweet time. I’m dying inside. Finally, I pay and bolt outta there.

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