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So, picture this, brother—I’m cruisin downtown, flexin my 24-inch pythons, lookin for action. Not wrestlin action, nah, somethin dirtier. Findin a prostitute ain’t like orderin a burger, dude. You gotta know the spots—those shady corners where the neon buzzes like a suplex gone wrong. I’m talkin alleys so sketchy even the rats are packin heat. Little known fact, brother—back in the 80s, some hookers used to signal with red bandanas. Code, man! Like a secret piledriver move.

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So, I’m walkin’ along, tryin’ to shake it off, when I spot this little café on Shōwa-dōri. I’m like, “Why not?” I grab a coffee, and it’s the best thing ever. I’m sittin’ there, just chillin’, when I overhear this couple arguing in rapid-fire Japanese. I can’t understand much, but the body language? Oh man, it’s like a soap opera. I’m tryin’ not to laugh, but it’s hard. They storm out, and I’m left there like, “What just happened?”

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