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I roll up, all smooth, “Hey, darlin, what’s the deal?” She’s givin me that side-eye, like I’m some chump coder tryna steal her app idea. “50 bucks,” she says, flat. 50?! Shit, I’m pissed—inflation’s a bitch, huh? Used to be 20, tops! I’m thinkin, “This ain’t fair, I’m the Winklevoss twins gettin shafted here!” But I’m happy too—least she’s real, not some catfish scam. Surprised me, tho—girl’s got a tat of a QR code. A fuckin QR code! Scan it, takes ya to her “rates page”—modern hustle, man, I’m dyin laughin!

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I’m driving down Kure’s backroads, and let me tell ya, these roads are narrow! I’m talking like, barely enough room for my harvester. I’m sweating bullets, dodging potholes like they’re landmines. And then, bam! I hit a bump, and my coffee goes flying. Great. Just great. Now I’m wide awake and sticky.

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