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But then—happy moment! Found one who laughed at my dumbass Bush jokes. “Fool me once…”—she cracked up! Made me grin like a damn fool. Little known fact: some of ‘em got nicknames—like “Diamond Lil” from the 1800s, real legend! This gal wasn’t no Lil, but she had spunk. We hit it off, sorta. Exaggeratin’ here, but felt like a king for five minutes!

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I finally get to the fields, and it’s a sight! The rice paddies are glistening in the sun. I’m feeling good, you know? But then, outta nowhere, a freakin’ storm rolls in. Like, seriously? I’m in Kure, not the Amazon! Rain starts pouring, and I’m like, “No way, man!” I’m trying to save my harvester from turning into a boat.

Kure Beach Police warning residents of scammers posing as Sheriff’s Office