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What gets me happy? When it works—smooth, no drama. Like, you find her, she’s chill, and boom, you’re king of the night. Surprised me once, too—met this bird who knew Tolkien! Swear she whispered, “My other ride’s an eagle,” and I was done—best night ever. Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but who cares? It’s my tale!

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Then, outta nowhere, my boss drops a huge project on me. Like, “Hey, can you finish this by EOD?” I’m like, “Sure, no problem!” But inside, I’m screaming. I mean, who does that? I’m drowning in spreadsheets and emails.