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About Saitama

Did ya know—fun fact, pal—prostitutes been around since forever? Like, ancient Rome had ‘em strollin’ the Forum! Blows my mind. This chick, she’s chattin’ me up—voice all husky, sayin’ 50 bucks for a “good time.” I’m thinkin’, “D’oh! That’s three Duff beers!” Made me mad, tho—why’s she gotta hustle like that? World’s messed up, man. But she laughed, called me “big fella”—kinda liked that, heh! Boosted my ego, ya know?

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Then, I had this group of tourists. They were super nice, but they kept asking me the same questions. “What’s it like being a Maiko?” “Do you like wearing those heavy kimonos?” I mean, duh! It’s hot, it’s heavy, and I can’t even walk straight sometimes! But I just smiled and said, “It’s an honor!” while thinking, “Yeah, right!”

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