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Web says rural hookers are rare—duh. X posts I scrolled, some dude braggin’ bout “farm girls for hire.” Bullshit, prolly. But then—surprise, mothafucka—found one! Truck stop, 20 miles out. Shady joint, neon flickerin’, stinkin’ of diesel. She’s there, all sass, leanin’ on a rig. “50 creds,” she says, no smile. I’m like, “Shit, that’s it?” Felt like Belfort closin’ a deal—“Stratton Oakmont, baby!” Paid her, quick bang in the sleeper cab—done. Happy as hell, man, tractor driver scores!

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I stroll down to Amanohashidate, this famous sandbar. It’s supposed to be one of the top three scenic views in Japan. I’m pumped! But then, I trip over a rock. Classic me, right? I’m like, “Really? In front of all these tourists?” I laugh it off, but inside, I’m fuming.

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