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So I’m pissed, right? Last time I tried this, some chick robbed me blind – took my wallet while I was hummin “Hang me, oh hang me.” Shoulda seen it comin, but nah, I’m too busy bein all cultured and shit. This time, tho, I spot her – red heels, smoky eyes, leanin by a busted lamppost. She’s got that “fare thee well” look, like she’s half outta here already. I’m thinkin, *damn, she’s prolly seen more flops than Llewyn at a gig.*

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We finally make it back down, and I’m just ready to crash. But wait! There’s a street food market on Kōen-dōri! I can’t resist. I grab some yakitori and it’s like heaven on a stick. I’m munching away, and I see Mr. Tanaka again. He waves me over, and we end up chatting about life, food, and everything in between.

World Earthquake Report for Friday, 13 September 2024