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Oi, mate, it’s me, Tyrion Lannister—witty as hell, “I drink and I know things.” So, you wanna talk findin’ a prostitute? Buckle up, coz I got thoughts—messy, loud, real ones! Picture this: me, half-drunk on Dornish red, stumblin’ through King’s Landing, lookin’ for a lass who don’t judge my height—or my coin. I’ve seen it all, from brothels smellin’ like roses to ones reekin’ of piss. Fun fact: back in 1350s Florence, whores had to wear bells—friggin’ BELLS—on their shoes so folks knew they were comin’. Imagine that jingle followin’ you down an alley, eh? Hilarious, but damn annoyin’ too.

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But then, just when I thought the day couldn’t get any crazier, I heard this loud noise. I turned around, and there’s a group of people doing a traditional dance right on the street! I was like, “What the heck?!” They were all dressed up in colorful outfits, and it was so infectious. I couldn’t help but join in. I have no rhythm, but who cares? We were all just having a blast.

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