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I’m scrollin these sites, thinkin, “Is this real or am I in the limbo?”—yep, straight outta *Inception*. Some profiles got pics so blurry you’d think they’re ghosts. Others? Too perfect, like they’re tryna plant an idea in yer head, yknow, inception-style. “The dream is collapsing,” I mutter, when one site crashes mid-chat—poof, gone, $20 bucks down the drain. Pissed me off somethin fierce! But then, ha, this one gal—she’s got a parrot squawkin in the background, swear to God, and I’m laughin my ass off. “That bird deserve a medal,” I says.

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Finally, I get to the field, and it’s packed. Farmers everywhere, buzzin’ like bees. I’m feelin’ pumped, ready to harvest some serious crops. But then, bam! My combine starts actin’ up. Like, c’mon! I’m in Takikawa, not a junkyard! I’m yellin’ at it like it’s a stubborn mule. “Get it together, you hunk of metal!”

Japan homeless support groups collect, redistribute 'Abenomasks' to those in need