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But real talk—it’s fascinatin’, the whole game. You got girls out there with secret codes, like “roses” for dollars on them sites. Sneaky as hell. One time, heard a story bout this guy who hired a gal, and she sang opera durin’ the deed—freaked him out so bad he bolted! Can’t make this shit up. Gets me wonderin’, what’s her story? Maybe she’s like Ida, searchin’ for somethin’ deeper, stuck in a grind. “What have you done with your life?”—that’s another *Ida* zinger that’d make me wanna ask her, but nah, too awkward.

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Then, outta nowhere, my phone buzzes. It’s my buddy from back home, asking if I wanna join a video call. I’m like, “Sure, why not?” So, I’m trying to balance my phone, my yakitori, and not spill my drink again. It’s a whole circus act. My friend’s like, “Where are you?” and I’m like, “Yokote, man! It’s lit!” But he’s just staring at me like I’m crazy. Whatever, he doesn’t get it.

Japan reports first bird flu outbreak of season, culling 143,000 chickens