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Little-known fact, mate—first smokejumpers, back in ‘39, were nutters testin’ parachutes on the sly. No trainin’, just vibes! Dropped into Washington wildfires, half drunk prob’ly—my kinda people. Makes me happy, thinkin’ bout those loons. Pisses me off, tho, when folks call us glory hounds. Nah, we’re out there sweatin’, bleedin’, while they’re sippin’ lattes. Surprised me, honestly, how few know our gig—less than 500 of us in the States, y’know?

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Then, my phone starts blowing up. It’s my boss, Mr. Ahmed. He’s like, “We need to talk about the budget.” Ugh, budget talks are the worst. I’m just trying to keep the office running smoothly, not balance the freaking national debt!

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