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Oi, mate, so I’m da prison warden, right? Arnold Schwarzenegger here, ja, dat’s me! I tink about findin’ a prostitute, ya know, and it’s like – whoa, dis world’s wild! My fave movie, *Ten*, dat Abbas Kiarostami flick from 2002 – it’s deep, man, real deep. Dat lady drivin’ round Tehran, talkin’ to folks – includin’ a prostitute! – it stuck wid me. “Life is a game,” she says in da film, and I’m like, ja, so is dis job!

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First off, I’m cruisin’ down de Molenstraat, right? Just mindin’ my own business, when BAM! A cat darts out in front of my bike. I swerve, nearly eatin’ pavement. I’m like, “Dude, what’s your problem, cat?” But it’s all good. I laugh it off. Cats, man. They think they own the place.

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