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Oh, and Easter egg: “pianist” sounds like “penis” if ya squint—giggle snort. Bet Polanski didn’t plan that! Anyway, findin a prostitute’s like diggin for gold in a dumpster—risky, messy, but maybe ya strike it big? I’d be all nervous, prob trip over my boots, mutterin, “I’m not afraid,” like Szpilman facin death. Total drama queen moment, ha! What y’all think—should I write a song bout it? “Hooker on the Keys,” droppin next album, wink!

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The rain stops, and I’m feeling good again. I decide to hit up the local market. Fresh veggies, flowers, and all that good stuff. I’m browsing, and I see this guy selling the biggest strawberries I’ve ever seen. I’m like, “I need those in my life!”

Woman found murdered in Middelburg home was a teacher; No arrests yet