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But srsly, it’s nuts – some of these gals got stories that’d make ya cry. One time, I heard this chick got into it ‘cause her fam ditched her. Pissed me off, man! Who does that? I’m all happy-go-lucky usually, but that? That’s colder than a Duff Beer on ice. Then there’s the johns – sneaky dudes, creepin’ around like Barney after a bender. Surprised me how many look like regular Joes – could be my neighbor, jeez!

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First off, I’m heading down the Hoofdstraat, and I’m already late for work. Classic me. I’m dodging cyclists like I’m in some kinda video game. Like, dude, it’s a street, not a racetrack! Anyway, I finally make it to the office, and guess what? My boss, Mr. Van Dijk, is in a mood. Ugh. He’s all like, “Where’s the quarterly report?” I’m like, “Chill, man, I’m on it!” But inside, I’m screaming.

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