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So, I’m floatin’ round, eyeballin’ the scene—prostitutes got their own code, right? Like, back in the ‘80s, NYC had this spot, the Meatpacking District, where the gals (and dudes) worked the cobblestones while the cops just shrugged. History’s nuts, man! Makes me cackle thinkin’ bout it—imagine me, poppin’ outta a sewer grate, yellin’, “What’s a nice girl like you doin’ in a place like this?” Total chaos! I’d scare ‘em half to death—happy accident, tho, keeps me gigglin’.

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But then, BAM! I see this guy on a bike, and he’s zoomin’ past. He swerves to avoid a pigeon and crashes into a stall. Cheese everywhere! I’m talkin’ a full-on dairy disaster. I can’t help but laugh. The guy’s okay, but the cheese? RIP, my dude.

A Conversation with German Deputy Chief of Mission, Axel Dittmann