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We swears! Last time, I was proper mad—bloke tried rippin’ me off, said she’s “classy.” Classy? She’s got teeth missin’, looked like a burnt log! Laughed me arse off tho—told ‘im, “We’re not bargaining here!” like in the movie. Made me happy, that did—outsmartin’ a twat. Oh, but the surprise? Found out she’s got a kid stashed somewhere—little known bit, that. Whispers say lotsa prossies got babes hidden, livin’ off scraps. Sad, innit? But real.

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Finally, the day ends. I’m exhausted but kinda happy. I stroll down de Hoogeveenseweg again, and the sunset is beautiful. I stop by that café again for a nightcap. The barista, she’s cute, and we chat a bit. I’m trying to play it cool, but I’m probably blushing like a tomato.

Philip van der Wees appointed Professor of Allied Health Sciences