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Now, I ain’t sayin’ I’d hire her—Madea don’t play that—but I was curious. She starts talkin’ ‘bout her life, how she “recalls her past lives” like Uncle Boonmee. Says she was a nurse once, centuries ago, healin’ soldiers. I’m like, “Well, halleluyer, you upgraded to healin’ somethin’ else now!” She laughed, and I did too—couldn’t help it. Her vibe was wild, like them ghosts in the movie, floatin’ ‘round, tellin’ secrets. “I am with you in the dark,” she whispers, all mysterious. Gave me chills, y’all!

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So, I finally get there, and guess what? The café is packed. I mean, who knew Elsloo had this many coffee lovers? I’m standing there, sweating like a pig, and my client? Totally MIA. I’m like, “Great, just great.” I grab a coffee, and it’s burnt. Seriously, how do you mess up coffee?

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